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The SEX Column and Other Misprints by David Langford

Contents List

Author biography Back to book page

Items newly added in the ebook edition are marked with a paragraph sign ¶.

  • Introduction to the 2005 book (plus a 2016 update)
  • SFX #1, June 1995: The Book on the Edge of Forever – telling the old, old story
  • SFX #2, July 1995: Awards Fever – on current SF awards
  • SFX #3, August 1995: We Told You So – SF and prediction
  • SFX #4, September 1995: Fandom As She Is Spoke – a few words about fan jargon
  • SFX #5, October 1995: Badgered to Death – Lionel Fanthorpe and Badger Books
  • SFX #6, November 1995: Noises Off – a cacophony of SF sound effects
  • SFX #7, December 1995: Visit Sunny Mordor! – on The Tough Guide to Fantasyland
  • SFX #8, January 1996: Hell's Cartographer – farewelling Sir Kingsley Amis
  • SFX #9, February 1996: The Lid Ripped Off! – a Langford interview
  • SFX #10, March 1996: Crosstalk – allusions and cross-references in SF
  • SFX #11, April 1996: On the Circuit – SF convention guest horrors
  • SFX #12, May 1996: Wreath of Stars – Bob Shaw remembered
  • SFX #13, June 1996: Stuffed with Large Insects – strange meals in SF
  • SFX #14, July 1996: Look at the Evidence – on John Clute as critic
  • SFX #15, August 1996: So You Want to Be a Reviewer? – tricks of the trade
  • SFX #16, September 1996: Big Bang Theory – SF superweapons
  • SFX #17, October 1996: Random Fandom – some of those esoteric fan terms misdefined
  • SFX #18, November 1996: The Case of the Red Planet – the current fad for Mars as a setting
  • SFX #19, December 1996: Hugos There? – weirdness and follies of SF's top awards
  • SFX #20, Christmas 1996: Blurbismo – who writes SF blurbs, anyway?
  • SFX #21, January 1997: Second Childhood – on J.P. Martin's "Uncle" books, now a free read at Infinity Plus.
  • SFX #22, February 1997: Read My Lips – about the MIT Press book on HAL 9000
  • SFX #23, March 1997: Nine Secrets of Stichomancy – how to write a short story in a morning
  • SFX #24, April 1997: Been There, Stole That – blatant literary thefts
  • SFX #25, May 1997: Curse of the Typo – hideous consequences of one or two scrambled letters
  • SFX #26, June 1997: Wells: Behind Closed Doors – sidelights on H.G. Wells's life
  • SFX #27, July 1997: My Fantasy Life – the horrors of working on The Encyclopedia of Fantasy
  • SFX #28, August 1997: It's Big! It's Dumb! – a round up of SF's Big Dumb Objects
  • SFX #29, September 1997: The Authorized Version – the gulf between what they wrote and what you see on the page
  • SFX #30, October 1997: The Oops Factor – silly SF science
  • SFX #31, November 1997: The Critic on the Hearth – the war between authors and critics
  • SFX #32, December 1997: The Numbers Game – gloating over shelves of Hugos
  • SFX #33, Christmas 1997: Take Me to Your Picard – on translation and Hofstadter
  • SFX #34, January 1998: Things to Do in Docklands When You're Dead – at the 1997 World Fantasy Convention
  • SFX #35, February 1998: Desert Island Books – convention panel silliness
  • SFX #36, March 1998: The Science of Cashing In – in the footsteps of The Science of Star Trek etc, a new look at Tolkien
  • SFX #37, April 1998: Is Discworld Literature? – according to the British Council it nearly was, but ...
  • SFX #38, May 1998: Naming Names – the old Langford hobby-horse of character names, appropriate or otherwise
  • SFX #39, June 1998: The Kink in Space – sensitive reappraisal of the Gor books
  • SFX #40, July 1998: Set Phasers to "Spoof" – skiffy parodies revisited
  • SFX #41, August 1998: What's in a Title? – book titling/retitling mysteries made less clear
  • SFX #42, September 1998: Old and Unwise – SF's ancients
  • SFX #43, October 1998: Bottom of the Barrel – running out of inspiration, Langford desperately quotes from The Eye of Argon
  • SFX #44, November 1998: Fifteen Point Oh Eight – more regrettable Hugo gloating
  • SFX #45, December 1998: Good Stuff – a few words about some neglected authors I rather like
  • SFX #46, Christmas 1998: Future Christmas – doing the time warp to examine hangovers 50 years hence
  • SFX #46, Christmas 1998: Tracking down Santa – highly literary contribution to an additional Christmassy feature in this issue
  • SFX #47, January 1999: Writing by Numbers – generating SF stories with computers and advanced Artificial Stupidity
  • SFX #48, February 1999: Cautionary Tales – the dark side of the farce as things go wrong on a US convention trip
  • SFX #49, March 1999: Ringing the Changes – get out of that plot rut
  • SFX #50, April 1999: Fan Scene – thoughts after Vince Clarke's death
  • SFX #51, May 1999: Shape of Things to Come – talking about shapeshifting in fantasy
  • SFX #52, June 1999: The Book of Joshua – doing the text for Josh Kirby's new art book
  • SFX #53, July 1999: Will U Kindly F O? – the SF view of ufology
  • SFX #54, August 1999: The Naughty Parts – smuggling rude bits into SF
  • SFX #55, September 1999: Judge Not ... – another tepid Arthur C. Clarke Award controversy
  • SFX #56, October 1999: Remembering Anode Enzyme – the late cartoonist John Glashan's SF weirdness
  • SFX #57, November 1999: Unclean! Unclean! – writers who desperately insist their SF efforts aren't nasty old SF
  • SFX #58, December 1999: The Last White Papers – James White remembered
  • SFX #59, Christmas 1999: What the Dickens? – Scrooge meets Thog
  • SFX #60, January 2000: Games Fans Play – varyingly irresponsible SF party games
  • SFX #61, February 2000: 1% Inspiration, 99% Perspiration – where do SF authors get their crazy ideas?
  • SFX #62, March 2000: Deep Science – that is, deeply crappy science in SF
  • SFX #63, April 2000: E and Me – the amazing e-publishing revolution, or not
  • SFX #64, May 2000: Nomad of the Time Streams – on Michael Moorcock
  • SFX #65, June 2000: One of the Funniest – remembering John Sladek
  • SFX #66, July 2000: Choose Your Own Column! – multiple-choice madness
  • SFX #67, August 2000: It's a Fix-Up – how to write like A.E. van Benford
  • SFX #68, September 2000: Bringing Them Back Alive – too many SF characters are dead but won't lie down
  • SFX #69, October 2000: Putting the Pot in Potter – you can't ignore J.K. Rowling, however hard you try
  • SFX #70, November 2000: Dream Libraries – repositories of imaginary books
  • SFX #71, December 2000: Ask Uncle Agony – implausible readers' letters
  • SFX #72, Christmas 2000: Old Moorecocke's Almanack – predictions for 2001
  • SFX #73, January 2001: A Nice Derangement of Epitaphs – mixed remembrances of Keith Roberts
  • SFX #74, February 2001: Langford Meets Swamp Thing – a guest trip to Florida
  • SFX #75, March 2001: Rare Book Department – rarities by John Sladek and others
  • SFX #76, Spring 2001: The Bottom Line – accountancy-driven publishing
  • Lord of the Rings promotional supplement, Spring 2001 – feature article "Tolkien: Lord of the Royalties" ¶
  • SFX #77, April 2001: Your Name In Lights – routes to lasting fame
  • SFX #77, April 2001: Small Press Gang – extra small-press review feature ¶
  • SFX #78, May 2001: The CD Shelf – my non-musical CD collection
  • SFX Collectors Edition: The Best Sci-Fi and Fantasy in the World Ever!, May 2001: Top Twenty Feature – a stab at listing the very best in not enough words ¶
  • SFX #79, June 2001: Lepermage of Elfspasm – secrets of creating fantasy titles
  • SFX #80, July 2001: Fame at Last – bogglement at the 2001 Hugo shortlist
  • SFX #81, August 2001: This Title Was Different – mysterious book title changes
  • SFX #82, September 2001: Sign Here – the terrors of autograph sessions
  • SFX #83, October 2001: Guesting in Moominland – Langford goes to Finland
  • SFX #84, November 2001: Wild Scrod (Anagram) – writing a second Discworld quizbook
  • SFX #85, December 2001: Real Life – impossible not to write about 11 September
  • SFX untraced issue (perhaps a film special), 2001: Pierre of the Apes – on Pierre Boulle
  • SFX #86, January 2002: Looking Backwards – on finding SF fandom when I were but a lad
  • SFX #87, February 2002: The Last Kirby – farewelling Josh Kirby
  • SFX #88, March 2002: Flat Earth Societies – Flatland and mathematical SF
  • SFX #89, Spring 2002: Wanted Dead or Alive – terrorist figures in SF , gosh how very topical
  • SFX #90, April 2002: Fanthorpe Forever – reporting from Lionel F's Jubilee event
  • SFX #91, May 2002: At the POD Races – update on small press and Print On Demand hassles
  • SFX #92, June 2002: Laugh with Lafferty – another farewell: R.A. Lafferty
  • SFX Deep Space Special, June/July 2002: 74 Years of Space Opera
  • SFX #93, July 2002: Getting Together – memories of Knight, Cowper and the Milford conferences
  • SFX #94, August 2002: Rubber Science – in which, idly nitpicking at scientific anomalies in SF, Langford terminally embarrasses himself
  • SFX #95, September 2002: Here It Comes Again – run! run! another Glasgow Worldcon!
  • SFX #96, October 2002: What Happened Next? – the bits that arrived too late for past columns
  • SFX #97, November 2002: At the Vampire Ball – another Discworld convention
  • SFX #98, December 2002: Lemony Who? – latest in this Series of Unfortunate Columns
  • SFX #99, Christmas 2002: Nostalgia Time – or, The Physics of Biggles
  • SFX #100, January 2003: Royal Telegram – looking back, and the Curse of Langford
  • SFX #101, February 2003: Banned! – censored SF and fantasy
  • SFX #102, March 2003: Words, Words, Words – weird SF words and names
  • SFX #103, April 2003: Slice of Life – the lucrative Hobbit lampoon that, in the end, I didn't write
  • SFX #104, May 2003: Hornblower in Space – nautical derring-do amid the interstellar tides and solar wind
  • SFX #105, June 2003: Wriggling on the Hook – this column is not science fiction, oh no, but imaginative speculation set in a hypothetical future, which is different
  • SFX #106, July 2003: Glittering Prizes – meandering through the SF awards scene
  • SFX #107, August 2003: Bits and Pieces – "time to catch up on some traditional Langford hobby-horses", in particular the #105 attitude and Margaret Atwood
  • SFX #108, September 2003: Pressed to Death – small presses; once again, the latest state of play
  • SFX #109, October 2003: Retro Chemistry – Oliver Sacks and memories of One Thousand and One Edifying Stenches, Bangs and Toxic Fumes for Boys
  • SFX #110, November 2003: Bottoms Up! – strange tipples in SF and fandom
  • SFX #111, December 2003: Torcon Memories – Langford at the Toronto Worldcon
  • SFX #112, Christmas 2003: The Long Goodbye – farewell to the Earthlight imprint
  • SFX #113, January 2004: Going, Going ... – more farewells: Eshbach, Clement
  • SFX #114, February 2004: The Editator: Judgement Day – the unnatural vice of self-anthologization
  • SFX #115, March 2004: Down the Rabbit Hole – recursive fantasies
  • SFX #116, April 2004: Censored! – persecution by filthy-minded software
  • SFX #117, May 2004: Copyright, Copywrong? – ditherings about intellectual property issues and the Ellison/AOL lawsuit
  • SFX #118, June 2004: Flounder Is Critical – highly promotable new authors and wordmills
  • SFX #119, July 2004: Then and Now – the changing face of SF clichés
  • SFX #120, August 2004: Bibliography Blues – in search of the Original Shaggy God
  • SFX #121, September 2004: Interzone: Goodbye and Hello – the old order changeth, yielding place to new ...
  • SFX #122, October 2004: Crimewatch! – SF ghosts in the world of thrillers
  • SFX #123, November 2004: Who Owns Your Name? – cybersquattery and corporate naughtiness
  • SFX #124, December 2004: I Was a Dunnikin-Diver – yet another Discworld convention
  • SFX #125, Christmas 2004: Secret Histories – Retro Hugos and a plug for Peter Weston
  • SFX #126, January 2005: As Others See Us – more outsiders' attitudes to that horrid SF stuff
  • SFX #127, February 2005: Centenaries and Things – looking back to 1905
  • SFX #128, March 2005: Note that Foot – unlikely footnotes and indexes
  • Afterword
  • All the Columns and Features (extending the above list to the last instalment in July 2016) ¶
  • Acknowledgements and Thanks

Author biography Back to book page